Ain’t Worth It

I don’t understand why I believed in you so much,

When it seemed like all the time,

I was let down

I only let you narrate using your eyes,

Not your words

I had so much faith in you,

But you never showed me any of your beliefs

I already knew falling in love with you was a mistake

I was annoyed with myself as soon as I fell in

But I ended up swimming for longer than I thought I would 

I kept on saying I was over you

That I was letting go of the ropes,

That I was being set free from the thick cage,

But still,

Your visionary arms kept pulling me back,

I kept seeing the brightness of your eyes at the end of the tunnel,

And I got too mesmerised and followed it

Leading me back into being in hostage 

But the way you’ve been acting lately,

Getting too confident

Bending rules as if it were a straw

I now know that it wasn’t worth it,

I knew that this would end in either tears,

Anger,

Frustration,

Or just general sadness 

Or I would be relieved that I would be left with no one to love,

Nothing to worry about

I knew it wasn’t worth it,

The price I’ve paid is too much 

You owe me a lot

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