There is always a time in your life when you find that special someone and start crushing on them and honestly, it’s one of the most memorable times of your life. So I thought before I become a teenager, I should do some storytimes under a category entitled: The Younger Years to give you guys an insight of how the younger ES acted. Also, it’s always a good time to share some embarrassing childhood stories to some people despite the cringey moments.
So today, I am going to share with you a story about my first crush in primary school. So for this I’m going to call him the Salami Crush or SC for short because… well you’ll know once I start talking.
So in Year 2 I started to like this guy and his name was Salami Crush (Jk, btw) and I knew him since Nursery. I remember him as the guy in Nursery who couldn’t keep his Brussels’ sprouts on the allocated side of his food tray as honestly, they were everywhere on his plate.
He was a cutie and a smartass and that was (and still kinda is) what I liked in a guy. I remember I would try and get his attention since we were in a different class and I wouldn’t see him a lot of the time. It was the time when we were put into sets I would be able to see him: we were both smartasses so that meant we were put in a smartass class together. I would stare at him like it was my job because, who doesn’t when they have a crush?
The funny thing is, when I actually do like a guy, I try to avoid him as much as possible. I mean, I do like a place where I can see them very well and possibly talk to if that was an option I chose, but I would not like to sit next to them because I’ll start to get shaky, and that’s never a good time. On the other hand, when I was in Year 2, I happened to be very extroverted and outgoing and when I had a crush, I actually wanted to get to know them more and talk to them, whether it was an option or not. This is how the next story comes up:
So in Year 2 we were learning about the Royal Wedding as that was going to happen very soon as it was in 2011, so we were given a research task and the questions that would need to be answered through the alliance of our brains and the internet. Because of this, we were in the ICT suite, where computers were present. So we entered the ICT suite and then I looked for somewhere to sit. Then eventually, I saw it: an empty seat and computer next to SC! It was if heaven had come on earth.
Without thinking, I ran towards the seat because, of course, I wouldn’t want anyone to get there before me. If they did, then my dreams would be crushed. I wouldn’t be able to link SC and we wouldn’t be able to make a magical dream house where our 18 kids would frolic around eating sugary animals and drinking prune juice. 😦
Thankfully, I did get the seat next to SC. Hooray! :D. And we did have a great time. I pretty much computer educated him. I taught him how instead of pressing one of the things listed when you type something into a search engine, you can just press the down button and enter. In addition to this, he (stupidly) thought he would get a proper answer when he typed in the search engine: When is the wedding going to start? He was pretty much just typing in the questions listed on the worksheet and trying to find answers since that was what it sounded like we had to do- bless him. I then informed him that to get a proper answer he had to type in: When is the royal wedding going to start? See, I’m a smartass.
The next story is about what happened on a school trip. So basically, we were going on a school trip to a nearby play centre to go have some fun: duh! During that trip, I did speak to SC. Too much for my liking. I’m joking I loved talking to him. So once, we negotiated because I couldn’t find my best friend and there was a particular part in there that I wanted to show her- it was a dark, neon room which played music and you could dance there and I knew she would love it. So we looked around the entire place for her and I remember we both finally found her through the power of our love and perfect searching. It was obvious we belonged together.
When we finally came back to school to eat our lunch, Damien (from the getting bullied in secondary school blog) had a sandwich with chocolate spread. I made him aware of this even though he probably already knew and then SC, the cheeky devil, was like “You’ve got tuunnaaaa!” I know it’s hard to believe but it was actually the pengest thing I’ve ever heard him say to me. (#Heart eyes yeah I see em) I just answered cutely: “And mayonnaise,”
Can you believe it? Why am I lying to myself, I sounded pretty damn stupid to be honest.
Year 3 was a special year for me when it came to SC and I.
So my friends and I were pretty much the only ones who knew about me having a crushy wushy on SC and I was planning for it to stay that way until the end of year 6. But that didn’t exactly work out.
I always pretty much believed that SC did secretly like me as much as I liked him and that once I declared my love for him he will realise how much he loved me as well and then we’ll fly away to our happy place and dance in fireworks and it will stay like that until the end of time… or whoever dies first either way.
So my plan backfired. I ended up letting SC I had a crush on him in year 3 instead of the end of year 6. The way we did this:
So, my bestie was sitting in front of SC in assembly so this gave her the opportunity to tell him I had a crushy wushy on him. Apparently, when she told him he made a face which was a combination of this:
😝 + 😖+😶 = SC
Before I actually let him know about this, I had two of my best friends- let’s called them Fatima and Sharma for this- give him a few hints that there actually was someone interested in him. They said things like: “You have a secret admirer” and “Your secret admirer loves you”
After letting him know I liked him, it seemed like he hated the fact that I liked him and also, a lot of people found out me having a crush on him, even my Year 3 teacher! (#BADATKEEPINGSECRETS)
A lot of people tried to interfere with the fact that I liked SC. But the thing is, he really didn’t enjoy the fact that I did. I mean why??
I’m such an awesome person! I only murder people once a week it’s not that bad! (Jk I ain’t a serial killer, I’m a waffle killer hehehe☠️😈)
Because of how disrespectful SC was being about the whole situation, my friends told my not to worry about it and even made fun of his head shape!:
“Yeah ES, don’t worry about that fish head!”
“Yeah, he’s a sausage head. In fact, he’s a SALAMI head!”
So that’s the reason why I gave him the code name, Salami crush: because he was my crush and a fish head.
But still, the bad thing about having everyone know about who you like, is that they’ll try and get you guys together- literally! They’ll snatch your body and literally drag it towards your crush to get you guys to link. Trust me, I seriously CANNOT count the number of times that has happened to me over the years in primary school. Unbelievable!
Anyways, I hope you enjoyed today’s story time, make sure you like comment and follow my blog to see more of these.
Also, make sure to tune in for part 2.
ES Ordinary xx